Better! ....wait, no, yes, no, yes

So Wednesday evening was a great recovery, drugs were doing good and felt like a million bucks in comparison.  Then by midnight it all came back with a vengeance, the infection must've kicked back in as I got tired. By 3am I reached the point of exhaustion that lead to vomiting (albeit 95% dry retching).  No sleep, throat was swollen to the point I could barely breathe and didn't manage to drink for 7 hours in the end. 

Fortunately my doctor is amazing and after a desperate phone call she prescribed more drugs. New antibiotics and some lovely Tramadol.  Suffice to say today has been a drug soaked haze. Combined with my already strong codeine dose, the tramadol has been working its magic combined with the second super strong antibiotic she gave me.

Who knows,  might actually be able to sleep tonight!

Double whammy

So I've gone and got an infection in my throat. Doc says 2-3 weeks recovery.

Bugger.

It hurts. A lot.

Edit - this evening I started bleeding quite a bit too. Been told to return to hospital, but going to see out the night as it wasn't much blood.

On the weight front I'm about 7lbs down on last Thursday and counting. Can't foresee any solid food soon so that'll continue to drop.

Misery. No company, just misery.

So on the 25th I went into hospital to have my tonsils out and this time it all went as planned. Saying that, the plan definitely seems to be 'let's see how bad we can make Ben feel'.

I've been advised recovery is a very firm two weeks, with the pain and discomfort actually worsening with time. I didn't believe this when I heard it, until this morning. I was told 'Day 3' would be one of the worst, and boy oh boy they weren't kidding. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy (not that I have one fortunately).

I've not eaten solid food since Thursday night, barring a meagre attempt at porridge this morning. Some health sites say warm drinks are best, some say cold. I've found green tea works best, and I've even invested in some Manuka honey just in case. 

No exercise for two weeks either, and no public/crowded places. Essentially just fourteen days of being a hermit on a liquid diet, moaning in agony and being fed up of the inadequate pain killers the hospital left me with.

Not the most positive posting in the world I will concede, but positivity is an effort right now. I've come home for a few days to start the recovery and my parents tell me my sleeping sounds a hundred times better than it did before, so mission accomplished I guess, just want he pain to go away now.

Week #7 (23/01/13)

EDIT: Weight is now with Weight Watchers scale.  Six pounds! Hell yeah!


Weight: 18st 11lb (-6lb !!!!!)
Chest: 45.5" (-0.1") 
Stomach: 45.25" (+0.5")
Waist (Hips): 42.25" (-0.55") 
Collar: 16.75" (-0.25")

Hoorah!

Okay so the stomach measurement is up a bit but I can explain that, quite quickly.  Gas.  

I've been dabbling in pro-biotic yoghurts on and off for the last few weeks and have noticed one very definite pattern; when I take a break from eating them after a good 4-5 days of continued consumption my digestive system goes to **** (no pun intended).  Indigestion, trapped wind and major bloating to the point of physical pain.

They've been removed forcibly from my fridge and I'm going to have to put up with things until they naturally settle and my own bacterial friends resume their duties (Activia "biffidus" can take a running jump off a cliff).

A weight loss finally, a sigh of relief for sure.  I'm not at all worried about the extra half inch back on the stomach line because I know where it's come from.  I am quite pleased the collar is notching it's way back in the right direction though, and the resumption of gym is assisting the waistline back that way too (I know it's only a small change, but it's still a positive change).

Just had a cracking lunch of a baked sweet potato and home made vegetable ratatouille, was so good I've had to resist having second.  Vegetables may be "free" points but I don't quite trust them saying potatoes are free (even sweet ones).

Back to the gym

So it's been around a week and a half since I last went, as noted in last weeks measurement post.  I'd stopped until I was used to biking to work.  The snow however has continuously interrupted that, so I decided to go back tonight.

Wow.  Even a short/re-intro session (3x15mins + 10mins cardio) and I'm feeling fantastic.  Really forgotten the buzz from a good workout.

Now it's time to quickly scoff some food before it's too late.

Tomorrow I'm going to set a dinner cooking in the morning on a slow cooker.  My plan, as recommended by my WW leader (and it was a good idea) is to switch my main meal to lunch and have a smaller meal in the evenings since I often don't get home from work until quite late.  I'll cook one day, portion it off in the evening, then take some to work the next day; repeat each day.

Foodwise I have to say this Filling & Healthy stuff is much more my thing, much more enjoyable and a lot less stressful than having to force myself to eat.  We'll see how it reflects on Wednesday, but I'm confident this week.

Another week, another plan

Okay, so, my Weight Watchers supervisor got back to me and we had a chat about things.

Her troglodyte stereotype ways aside (she told me she asked her husband "Would you eat quiche and coleslaw as a man?", apparently gender plays a big part in the food we eat according to her), she has conceded that the 57 point goal is the problem.  She questioned why I was snacking so much and eating such big meals, to which I replied rather vehemently that her points value dictated I had to.

I'm not normally a snacking person, especially not sweet stuff, and I'm not a particularly heavy eater either.  I don't drink fizzy pop or creamy coffees or anything like that.  I like my three meals, I like them to be light and healthy.  I didn't like being told I had to eat 700000 plates of food a day (which is what it felt like).

I've been switched off the ProPoints scheme and onto their emergency backup plan called "Filling & Healthy".  Amongst the points values for every food under the sun, Weight Watchers have a slew of foods marked as "Filling & Healthy", things like tuna, wholegrain bread, brown rice etc etc; "good foods" you could say.  Under the F&H scheme you no longer record points, as long as you eat only from the F&H range.  Essentially it forces a healthy diet.  You still have 49 weekly points to track extras/treats, but that's it.

I started on it this morning and can already say it's a relief not having to count and double everything I eat.  We'll see how it goes next Wednesday on the scales though.

Exercise has been disrupted by crazy snow once again.  I've also got a big University assignment due in soon and most of my free time will be taken on that for the next week or two.  I think I'll safely plan to resume regular gym after my surgery recovery is complete.

On a brighter note, a much brighter note, today I tried on a shirt I've not been able to wear in two years.  Not only that, but when I did last wear it, it was a snug/hug shirt.  Today I managed to get in it without nearly tearing buttons, but on top of that it's actually looser fitting than when I first bought the thing.  How's that eh? So much for my negative nancy statements of nothing being achieved.

Perplexed

As I've edited into yesterdays post, my weight once again remained unchanged.  19st and 3lbs exactly, not a gram up or down.  This has my Weight Watchers leader completely perplexed.

Luckily, I've recorded every little thing I've eaten or drank in the last two weeks and left the records with her.  She's going to go over it all and I'll be calling her tonight to see if we can figure things out.

I know of research into links between Narcolepsy and Obesity, particularly the creation of brown fats causing problems for those of us lacking in Orexin.  Beginning to wonder if afterall this research has meaning.  The following link gives a brief explanation of the situation:

http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2011/10/111004123558.htm

Maybe she's come across narcoleptics before, who knows.  The confusing thing here is, does it mean I have to eat less than I should do accomplish the same goals? At a glance it does, but where does that fit into metabolic theory and so on? I must admit even though I've not lost weight, my energy levels have for the most part been much better since I began the increased eating (although also as mentioned before, I've changed many variables, it could just as easily be the type of food or the exercise doing this too).

Who knows.  The exercise was still working in terms of measurements at least, apparently, and people keep telling me I look trimmer even if I don't feel it.  Maybe if I keep going long enough I'll eventually start losing some weight just by willpower and determination alone.

Week #6 (16/01/13)

Is it really 6 weeks already since I made this thing?  Doesn't feel it.

Anyway, leaving for the weigh-in soon, but here be this weeks numbers.


Weight: 19st 3lb (unchanged)
Chest: 45.6" (+0.1") 
Stomach: 44.75" (-1.25"? hmmm, might remeasure that)
Waist (Hips): 42.8" (+0.55") 
Collar: 17" (+0.25")

Ups and downs I guess, could be worse.  Really not sure about that stomach measurement...

Remeasured, came out at 45", so almost the same.  Guess it would help if someone with a clue was doing the measurements, but needs must.  It's still an inch off if true, so I'll take what I can.  Have to say it doesn't feel that way though.  Also remeasured hips, this time came out at 42.25", unchanged from last week.

Basically I think I need to either get someone knowledgeable in clothes/measurements to do it, or accept there will be fluctuations.

The collar size going up was a disappointment, I know for sure I didn't overstretch on that one last week, it was a comfortable 16.75".

There has been no gym this week as I'm sure you've noticed from the posts.  I tried on Wednesday but will confess to being in too shit a mood after Weight Watchers, as well as being exhausted from spending a week eating their pre-prepared foods.

I have however been clocking 5 miles a day on my bike riding too and from work (when weather allows).  The ride is already getting easier after just a few days, which has been nice.  I ordered a more comfortable seat too which arrived and was fitted today, so less like sitting on a concrete block.

I'm going to spend one more week away from the gym and focus on the riding.  My thinking is reducing variables until I find something that works for me.  I've changed a LOT of factors in my life recently, sometimes back and fore more than once (in the case of diet) and I think I just need to step back a bit and let a few of the changes kick in.  I am definitely not giving up on the gym, but just giving myself a week or so to try and achieve something on Weight Watchers as well as adjust to riding to and from work every day.

On a different note, I just compared the measurements to my Week #1 numbers out of curiosity.  Apparently I've taken an inch and a half off my chest, as much as 3-4" off my stomach, half an inch off my neck and a staggering half an inch off the waist line.  Take the victories as they come Ben, don't be fussy!  

(this is me trying to be positive, as to be honest the numbers and the photos pretty much show my efforts have amounted to slightly less than **** all)

Snow joke

Didn't make it to the gym on Monday, half a dozen inches of snow (and by the time I got home, ice) put paid to that plan.  Fell on my arse three times just trying to get to the end of the office driveway.  Couldn't ride the bike either, so had to get a lift.

I've got a late meeting at University tonight, but may try and get there afterwards.

I know I've been slacking off this last week, but feel like things have just been thrown at me a bit.  My University job has a habit of getting the better of me and is starting to do so again.  I've got to write an experimental three-group lecture for the 14th, a session that is going to be observed by my post-grad supervisor as part of my Masters.  I've also got another assignment due in on the 5th of February that I've still not even started.  And then finally I'm into hospital on the 25th, meaning I'll probably need to get everything done before then.

I'm missing the activity.  Work is leaving me drained most days and I'm falling back into a bad routine a bit.  I know once I get the assignment out of the way my mind will relax a bit (although after this one, I've only got a month to do another, this time the grade making up 75% of the year too).  Itching to get this surgery out of the way and just get on with things after it's done with.

I'll be completely honest and express that I was disappointed in myself at how hard I found the commute on my bike too, really though I'd deal with it a bit better than that, especially with the work I've been putting in this last month.  Onwards and upwards though.

This isn't the beginning-of-the-end of yet another New Years Fad, I'm sticking with it long term.  The eating is still going well (Weight Watchers weigh-in tomorrow, should be good for a laugh!) and the desire is still there.  Just struggling a bit on time.

Not giving up though, not by a long shot.

I want to ride my bicycle

So after the fun and games of having to pay repeatedly to get a brand new bike to work properly, and practice aplenty to learn to ride again I gave my office/home route a go on Saturday.  Suffice to say, I was a much healthier teenager than I ever gave myself credit for.  My legs felt like lead by the time I got home, and it was certainly a good workout (but equally certainly more fun than sitting on an exercise bike).

The route I took Saturday was 1.9m each way, although that took me along several main roads I'd prefer to avoid.  I've figured out a route this morning that will avoid all the major roads and is 2.3m each way.  That'll put me at just under 5 miles a day on biking.  Should certainly make a difference, right?

Spent some time over the weekend talking to my Police friend about diet and got some input from him on some changes to make.  He's of the opinion that my gym difficulties are down to energy levels & carbs rather than protein/recovery, so I've shuffled a few things around and changed up a few bits so shall see how it goes.  He's also suggested I downsize what I do at the gym, break it down into less of a marathon session(s) while I'm still finding my way.

My goal is a simple one, to be able to maintain a regular exercise routine while cycling to and from work without dying.  The latter will just come with time.  The former is needing some tweaking, but I WILL get there.

My eating changes are conflicting a little with Weight Watchers, but I'll just have to wing it.  I ended Sunday some 22 points short of my daily allowance, which isn't ideal, but what can I do? What they call "normal" or "maintenance" allowance is 26 points a day, and I still had 22 points to use at 11pm while feeling quite full from the days consumption.  I get the impression Weight Watchers was never intended to be used in conjunction with an exercise/healthy lifestyle, they work on the assumption you're still going to be eating regular/unhealthy food, and just teach you portion control.

Shall see on Wednesday.  I intend to hit the gym tonight, but a slightly trimmer session. 

Normal session:
15 minutes walk/jog warmup
3 x 20 minutes cardio (selection of bike, hand bike, vario, cross trainer, rower, ski machine of death)
15 minutes walk cooldown
800-850 calories burned as a goal

Today I shall do:
15 minutes walk/jog
2 x 15 minutes cardio (with at least one being cross trainer, since it burns 8000000 times more calories)
15 minutes walk cooldown

That'll limit me to an hour.  On top of my cycle commute it should be good enough.  My swimming shorts finally arrived too, so the next step is 5am wake-up to swim before work.

Oh, can't remember if I mentioned before.  New surgery date of the 25th, so my aim is to really get things going properly before then, since I'll be knocked out for two weeks following that.

Sent to try us

After Wednesdays debacle at the gym I've been rethinking things a bit this week.  The entire week hasn't gone well and I need to see if I can figure out what it is.  I'm pretty sure diet (ready meals are bad, regardless if Weight Watchers thinks otherwise), but also beginning to think my work routines aren't helping.

Part of elimination however is patience, so I'm working on one factor at a time.  As noted in the previous post, the first stop is diet.  I've gone back to fresh food, lots of vegetables/salads (and yes, even occasionally fruit).  What was clear though was that even before the "Weight Watchers Week", I was definitely skipping on too much protein.  I think this has been a big contributor to the continuing struggle I've had at the gym (we're talking struggle in maintenance, not even trying to improve much).  Doing the same session twice in a row has become nigh impossible, even leaving a day or two in between.  So I've shifted my shopping a bit and shall be upping on the protein.  I'm not straying into the likes of supplements/shakes, I don't think I need that, but just more meat & amino acids in my diet.

I have started taking vitamin and particularly calcium supplements this week though, as by tracking my food intake (one benefit of Weight Watchers at least) I've noticed my calcium intake is pretty low.  Don't think this is affecting me much with the exercise, but worth mentioning.

I'll be returning to the gym on Monday, didn't get to go Friday.  Why? My bike arrived Friday evening, woooo! Except.... it was put together by blind monkeys.  Ended up at Halfords until 8pm getting it fixed (twice).  Fortunately the suppliers have said they'll refund the costs.  Front brakes weren't fitted properly, rear brakes weren't balanced, front gears didn't shift (and the cable later snapped), rear well almost fell off, rear tyre was flat, front gear shift wasn't fitted properly.... yeah, great fun.

After getting it all fixed I jumped on and was ready to ride home from work, but then I found I've forgotten how to ride.  It's been 18 years since I last rode a bike, and I'm like bambi on ice.  Time to relearn!

All in all it's not been a great week, but I'm going to ride it out and start with a clean slate come Monday and try and get back on track.

Confirmed

Weight Watchers is bleugh.

Weight remains at 19st 3lb, unchanged.  The woman at the meeting looked most confused.  I've struggled to eat as much as they want me to, but I've damn well tried.  The complete lack of loss really took the wind out of my sails today and the gym was a complete disaster.

I'm switching back to my own dietary plan for now.  I'll still keep tracking points, but I'm doing things my way, which was working.  Also going back to real food, fresh food, none of this Weight Watchers prepared bollocks.  Been more tired and bloaty this last week than in ages, and it's since I switched to their food.

Weight Watchers....

....is ****.


I've not got my weigh-in until this evening, but I'm seriously unhappy.  Just done my measurements for the week.


Weight: TBC
Chest: 45.5" (no change) 
Stomach: 48" (+1.5"!)
Waist (Hips): 43.25" (+1")
Collar: 17.5" (+0.25")

Yeah, great show Weight Watchers.  "Sign up to our scheme to lose weight by eating twice as much as you used to and pile on the inches in the mean time!".  I've never been bothered about the digits involved with my weight, losing the inches was a better gain for me if I had to choose from the two.  One week on WW has wiped out all the gains I've made in size since before Christmas.  All week I've been feeling the size creeping back on via the clothes, but I was hoping it was more mind over matter.  Seems not.

I'm going to give WW a week or two more, but if this continues then I'm going back to doing things my way.

Pictures to follow once I get to the office.

EDIT/ADDITION: Still not done my weigh-in yet, leaving soon, but just measured the way I normally do (with a proper soft tape measure).  This morning I was curious at home, so used a piece of string, then measured the string.  Well, a slight difference.  Red is AM, blue is PM.


Weight: 19st 3lb (unchanged)
Chest: 45.5" (no change) // 45.5" (no change)
Stomach: 48" (+1.5"!) // 46" (-0.5" from previous week, -2" difference from AM)
Waist (Hips): 43.25" (+1") // 42.25" (no change from previous week, -1" from AM)
Collar: 17.5" (+0.25") // 16.75" (-0.5" from previous week, 0.75" difference from AM)

Now there's a couple of options.  Most obviously there will have been a slight discrepancy with me moving the string from hip to tape measure.  However, particularly in the case of the stomach I think I have my CPAP machine to thank for this mornings gargantuan result.  I have the crap luck to be affected by "aerophagia" when using CPAP (essentially, I get inflated, leads to a gassy morning!) and usually wake up bloated.  Guess I forgot to account for that this morning.

Leaving in 30 minutes for this weeks Weight Watchers meeting for official weigh-in.  I have to say, even with the reduced (and improved) measurements... I don't feel smaller.  In previous weeks I could feel the benefits of my efforts.  Since last Wednesday I feel fat, bloated, and uncomfortably stretched.  Mind over matter from eating more? Who knows I guess.

Certainly doesn't look any ****ing smaller to me :(

Like a boss

Did go.  Was awesome.

Beat all my times from Friday by a couple of seconds here and there, and also upped the total calories from 800 to 850 too.  Ravenously hungry by the time I got home.

On a related note, I think I need to change my work hours.  My regular dayjob is 10-6, which means gym is 6.30-8.30, which in turn means I'm lucky to be eating dinner by 9pm.  Too late for my liking.

I'm thinking once I get to 6am swimming, I'll shift to an 8-4 pattern which will get me to the gym a lot earlier as well as let me beat the evening rush.  Ordered some new swim gear today (seemingly it's ****ing impossible to buy a pair of swimming shorts in my town).

Oh, and I ordered my bike yesterday (and helmet/lights/high viz).  Should be here by Wednesday.

It's all go!

Motivation

First day back at the office.  Mountains of work that's been sent over the holiday period.  Exhausted and it's only 4:30pm.

MUST
REMAIN
MOTIVATED

Tonight is meant to be a gym night, straight from work.  I'm going to go if it kills me, but the desire is minimal at the moment, just want to go to bed.

Good sesh!

Cracking session.  After warmup decided to use calorie goals rather than blanket time.  Walk, bike, cross, arm bike, walk, 800 calories.

More food, crap evening, back we go

So as mentioned, signed up to Weight Watchers.  Also as expected, finding it very difficult to eat as much food as they want me to.  I seem to have increased my eating by quite an amount, and I'm at a loss as to how this is going to lead to shedding pounds.  We'll see I guess.

Didn't get to the gym yesterday.  Was on my way home from shopping when a car nearly swerved into me in my lane.  Saw why, there was a cat in the middle of his own lane, and it'd been hit.  I suppose I should see the positive that drivers were at least avoiding it, but noone was stopping to help.  As a cat owner myself I rapidly U-turned and pulled up behind the poor chap.  I had expected it to be dead, and my plan was to simply block it off and go door to door to try and find the owner.  As I got out though it started to move and rolled over.  Panic mode engaged.  In a stroke of coincidence, there's a late night vet not far from where we were so I bundled the poor moggy (a large long haired ginger and white male) into my car and raced to the vet.  Sadly it appears he passed away during the journey :(

He was microchipped, so at the very least the vet was able to contact the owner (there's nothing worse than not knowing what happened to your pet).  She asked if I wanted to leave my details, and for some reason I agreed.  The whole incident really got to me, especially the way noone would stop to help.  A few hours went by in the evening and I was just starting to settle when I got a phonecall, it was the owner.  She was expectedly in tears and horrendously upset, which set me off again too.  I've been in her position, and could only imagine what she was feeling.  She was thanking me for trying to help.  Only wish I could've got him there sooner.

Hitting the gym shortly.  I've got a stinking cold on top of still feeling a little fragile (so sue me, I'm a cat person, it got to me).  Will see how I get on, but going to give it my best.

Week #4 (2/1/13) Glass half full?

 

Not what I'd hoped for, although a positive twist to follow.

Firstly, and minorly, I have numbers that don't add up. My scales at home are based on Kilos, and I've been using an online converter for stones/pounds. My last measurement was 122kg, which according to Captain Internet was 19st 3lb. I've just weighed in at home at 123.1kg. However, I also just joined Weight Watchers tonight and their imperial scales weighed me in at 19st 3lb. Numbers don't add up. For now, I'll stick with my home scales.



Weight: 19st 5lb / 123.1kg / 271.4lb (+2lb)
Chest: 45.5" (-1/2")
Stomach: 46.5" (-0.75")
Waist: 42.5" (-0.5")
Collar: 17.25" (-0.25")

So I've gained 2lbs, but shaped down across the board. I'm declaring this a minor victory, especially given this was over the Christmas period.

Weight Watchers have allocated me 57 points a week, with a first goal (5% weight loss) as 13lb. I start on that tomorrow. Going to be interesting to see how it marries up with my gym work. Apparently I can convert activity into ProPoints, but we'll see how that goes. I know my mother and sister struggled to eat their points allocation (as in, they couldn't find enough "good" food to eat, they were eating for the sake of it (but still lost weight)) and they only started on 30odd and 40odd. I'm very optimistic to get going on it though, I've seen it work very well in both friends and family.

EDIT - I have got pictures, but will need to get them uploaded tomorrow.